Well, lets just say that my path to healing was a rocky one, which
everyone has to deal with at some point. My healing started about 1
and a half years ago, my friend which i was talking to during my
struggles was getting to the point where she could no longer help me,
well she could but it was getting to a point where it was out of
control, so she had to tell my mom what was going on and i had to get
taken into the doctors, which was pretty brutal, because the trust
that i had was broken.
Also that year i went to Youth Quake '06 with my youth group.
For
me going to something like that, was nerveracking mainly because
during my struggles, i was very insecure about who i was so i stayed
away from participating in anything where i was around people. So it
was a big stretch for me. But through the speakers, and my youth
leaders i was deeply impacted by what was said. this event was what
mainly led to my healing, along with other things previous to that
time helped me a lot.
My advice for anyone who is dealing with cutting, or thoughts of
suicide is, who need not only help from god, but from a doctor of
some sort. It is crucial to your recovery. I know that now, although
my friend broke the trust we had, it worth it in the long run. I know
that it isnt easy to fess up to what you have done and admit to
needing help, but it is so important. Cutting is so dangerous, and
can bring you down until you hit rock bottom, and rock bottom is
where you feel like there is no hope left. Feeling hopeless and like
there is nothing left to live for, is what causes the thoughts of
suicide.I personally still struggle with it, it is something where
you do it once and every time soemthing goes wrong you turn to it
because it seems like the easy was out. You just need to remember
that it never is, and that there is a lot of people that would be
willing to help you. One thing you will notice is that you will crave
it, but you also need to remember is that satan attacks our weakest
parts. As a person that has delt with cutting, depression and the
thoughts of suicide i urge you to get help, not only will it benfit
you but everyone around you. A common thought that is mistaken in
your times of trouble is that no one notices. Thats what i thought
until my mom asked what was going on, this was before she was told
but it was clear that she knew something was wrong.
Get help, thats what would recommend... it doesnt always have to be
through a doctor first, youth leaders and friends can be a good
help... but you have to remember that they can only do so much.
a verse that would be good for anyone dealing with this is
Eccliasiastes 3, read it and take it to heart.
Erin
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